Mothers Day. This can be a happy day for some. But for others it can be a painful reminder of desire unfulfilled, of shame, of disappointment, of loss, and of heartbreak.
At the risk of sounding like a complainer, here I go. My biggest problem is that the way the Church generally celebrates Mothers Day is too limiting, too superficial, too surfacy, and too cute.
What about those who are hurting?
This could be an opportunity to acknowledge and empathize with those who are struggling on this day. It might be messy. But aren’t we called not only to rejoice with those who rejoice but also to weep with those who weep (Romans 12:15). I have read and heard about how there are women who cannot face the pain of going to church on Mothers Day. They feel shamed and forgotten. So they stay away. As a childless woman in my thirties, I understand the urge to avoid church services on this day. I can celebrate the mothers in my life, but that doesn’t quite distract enough from my own unmet longings and disappointment. I thought that I would be a mother by now. Will I ever get to be a mother?This day carries a special, secret kind of shame for me. As a side note I remember once when Bill Johnson took time to acknowledge and empathize with women during a Mothers Day church service. Unfortunately people like Bill are rare gems.
What about spiritual mothers?
I know of women who were/are incredibly mothering and yet had/have no natural children of their own. I know of women who were mammas to many and yet never experienced childbirth. This could be an opportunity to honour those who are/were mothers in the faith.
What about acknowledging and celebrating the Mother heart of God?
God is described in scripture not only in masculine terms, but also in feminine terms. As in a mother hen gathering her chicks (Matthew 23:37), or as a nursing mother (Isaiah 49:15-16). This could be an opportunity to reflect on this aspect of God, and honour how women reflect the feminine nature of God. In the words of the Gungor song, God is not a white man.
Is it wrong that I want more from the Church is regards to how this day is commemorated? Is it wrong to ask the Church: could Mothers Day have more substance, and less hallmark card?